Infidelity 101

Sometimes extramarital affairs occur alongside or within the context of a loving, committed marriage. Affairs do not always indicate a problem with the marital relationship.

Infidelity is often likely to engender strong emotional responses, dogmatic thinking, emotional defensiveness and moral rigidity in clients as well as their therapists. However, contrary to what is commonly believed by the public and assumed by many therapists, extramarital affairs are neither:

  1. Rare
  2. Exclusively men’s doing
  3. Signal the end of a marriage or relationship

In fact, the discovery that one or both partners have moved outside the boundaries of their marital vows seeking to have needs met, or growth expanded, may open a window of opportunity. It may bring each partner toward greater intimacy and deeper insight into themselves as well as their spouse.

Partners in more than a third of all marriages (inclusive of many cultures, male or female initiators, gay or straight, youthful or geriatric) are being challenged to confront and deal with the complexities of extramarital affairs. Indeed, infidelity has become an equal opportunity affair. Internet or online affairs have become extremely prevalent.

There is also a recent and growing acceptance, especially among the younger generation, of non-traditional relationships including polyamory, and open marriage.

In this section we will look deeper into the reasons WHY a person would cheat on their spouse.

Researching monogamy is a fascinating as it is complex. In the link below, I share some current research and videos from our top thought leaders in this area

You may also like to review current statistics and info-graphs on infidelity, marriage, and dating

1 Comment


    Thank you. I’m just dealing with my husband’s infidelity and trying my best to not only forgive but get beyond this nightmare.



  1. Is Online Cheating worse than Physical Affairs? - The Infidelity Recovery Institute - […] to the secretive nature of online affairs, reliable statistics are hard to find, but a 2005 study of 1,828…

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