10 FACTS ABOUT INFIDELITY YOU DIDN’T KNOW

The news of your partner’s infidelity could come to you unexpectedly. It could be a text message, email, picture or anything that shows that your partner has been unfaithful. According to psychologists, the human mind often seeks an explanation for almost everything that happens in life. So, on the discovery, the betrayed partner would wonder why it happened and look out for possible ways to prevent reoccurrence.

If you wish to prevent infidelity in your relationship then I must say that there isn’t any 100% effective rule that can help you succeed in your endeavour. What I mean is that; people cheat for different reasons and sometimes for no reason. I have seen people cheat on their perfect spouses.  So, I think being faithful or unfaithful is largely dependent on personal choice and partly on the situation of things between the couple.

Every day we are faced with different questions on infidelity because people want to know the main root of infidelity. A good knowledge of infidelity would guide you in handling infidelity issues when they arise in your relationship. So, in this article, we shall discuss some facts about infidelity.

1. Infidelity is more common than you think:

In spite of universal unacceptability, infidelity still occurs with remarkable regularity. While statistics vary from one study to another, they indicate that in general 20 to 50% of men and 15 to 30% of women have extramarital affairs.

These data are also constant over time. An American Researcher, Alfred Kinsey had already demonstrated in the 1950s that 50% of men and 26% of women in the US have had extramarital relationships.

2. Happy couples also have extramarital affairs:

Being happily married doesn’t mean you are immune to falling in love with an outsider. It also doesn’t mean that you would always be able to walk past a tempting offer.  A study conducted by Helen Fisher, an Anthropologist at Rutgers University in New Jersey, found that 56% of men and 34% of women who had an extramarital affair actually rated their marriage as “happy” or “very happy.”

3. Women cheat quite often:

Gone are those days when women were virtuous and reserved. Nowadays, we find more shameless women parading themselves on the streets as wives and mistresses.  How did this happen? Some experts argued that the invention of apps and other dating sites that facilitate anonymity actually prompted the drastic increase in female infidelity.

4. Men and Women cheat for a different reason:

Most women cheat because of love and money while most men cheat because of sex. Although, we can still find lazy men who cheat because of money.

5. Men hide their wives’ infidelity:

When men cheat, the women are often quick to spread the news all around but when a woman cheats, her husband might find it difficult to tell. This is because he sees his wife’s infidelity as an insult to his manhood.

6. The workplace is always a temptation zone:

Most of us often spend more time at work than at home. We already know that working closely with someone for long hours can easily make one develop feelings.  Have you ever wondered why a boss would have an affair with his secretary?  It is because she is always there with him.

According to a 2012 study by Undercover Lovers, an extra-marital dating site in the UK, 57% of women confessed to having developed feelings of affection for a co-worker, while only 27% of men said the same thing.

7. It is very natural to cheat:

Most people have often argued about how wrong it is to be unfaithful but did you know that biologically it is very normal to cheat? A study at Binghamton University in New York linked the dopamine D4 receptor (responsible for thrill-seeking, such as drinking and gambling) with infidelity.

8. What you shouldn’t do after discovering your partner’s infidelity:

• Avoid any act of violence.
• As much as possible avoid asking intimate details about your partner’s infidelity. Do not ask him if his mistress was better than you in bed… I guess you wouldn’t want to hear the truth because answers to some intimate details could hurt you and affect your healing process. Only ask relevant questions.
• Do not take any decision while you are still angry. Try to calm down then discuss the affair before making any final decision.

9. Forgiveness is possible:

According to research, a man finds it more difficult to forgive his wife for a sexual affair while the woman finds it more difficult to forgive her man for an emotional affair. Irrespective of how traumatic you felt after the discovery, forgiving the unfaithful spouse is always possible.

 

10. A good counselor does the magic:

When two people are at loggerheads, they might not know the appropriate way to express their feelings. For that reason, a middleman is required and that is where the counselor comes in. A good counselor listens, guides, and directs the couple on the best ways to resolve their issues. Don’t neglect the services of a good counselor because so far, counselors have saved many marriages from crashing.