Focusing: A Path Toward Befriending Feelings During the 1960’s, the psychologist and philosopher Eugene Gendlin asked a simple question: why do some people make progress in psychotherapy, while others don’t — and what is happening within those individuals who are benefiting from therapy? After analyzing hundreds of taped therapy sessions, Gendlin and his team discovered […]
“If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking.” ~Proverb In my years living as a control freak searching for the secret to happiness, I have discovered one thing that always rings true. Life seems to get so much better when I give up control. I have […]
Making Sense of Infidelity …how understanding it all helps you Whether you are staying or leaving, there is value in understanding what the infidelity in your relationship meant, and where it came from. We cannot fully heal and let go, until certain processes are completed. When the storm settles down, as you move through the […]
It is important that adult children of infidelity feel able to share their thoughts and feelings with another person—be it a parent or trusted other—rather than hold onto any anger they feel towards the unfaithful parent. Often, expressing anger or hatred leads to deeper feelings of sadness, hurt, and fear. Working to understand the main […]
Are children truly effected if one of their parents cheat? How do the children really feel about their Dad or Mom cheating? Ana Nogales, Ph.D., author of Parents Who Cheat: How Children and Adults Are Affected When Their Parents Are Unfaithful, coined the term “children of infidelity” to identify children of any age whose parent […]
Does this look familiar to you? Nagging: repetitive inquiring/asking/reminding, with a tone of escalating irritability. Why, oh why, do we nag?! It annoys the nag-ee. It actually even annoys the nagger! Plus, nagging doesn’t work. Even if it elicits the desired results (i.e., the thing we’re rattling on about actually gets accomplished), it’s with a […]
When there is too much “I” and not enough “We.” When maintaining a sense of closeness is not a priority, intimacy atrophies. It can happen gradually. One day you wake up and suddenly realize you just feel so… far away… from your partner. How did that happen? And how do you get back that sense […]
G’Day Everyone! Elle Magazine Australia recently interviewed me regarding the growing issue of women having affairs in their 1st year of marriage. For those of you who cannot grab a copy of this months Elle Magazine, Australian Edition, May 2014, I have attached the article for you. Please feel free to add your comments. Do […]
Readers Article Contribution Winston Churchill once said, “I do not ask how the wounded person feels. I simply become that wounded person.” Far too often, our society loses touch of this basic principle of empathy. And I am no exception. In fact, I have been quite the opposite for the past several months, writhing in […]
These 4 behaviors are poison to relationships. Watch this and find out how to avoid them. Criticism: It’s okay (and can be healthy) to complain about what’s wrong in your relationship, the problem arises when complaining turns into criticizing. A complaint focuses on the event or behavior you want to change, whereas criticism attacks […]