Infidelity Quiz

Ten Question Quiz:

Answer these questions honestly, and you will be able to gauge the likelihood of your marriage being affected by infidelity.

1) We decided to get married less than a year after we met.

2) You are both aged under 25 years old.

3) Your partner has unexplained mood swings that are hard to predict.

4) You and your partner don’t talk about your day much after coming home at night.

5) You both maintain separate hobbies and interests.

6) You and your partner are in your first seven years of marriage.

7) You and your partner have children under the age of two.

8) You and your partner both look over and analyze phone, utility and bank account statements.

9) You and your partner make the effort to holiday together when you are able.

10)  You both get along well with your mother and father-in-laws.

 

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Grading:

For every question you answer, follow the chart below and add the corresponding number to get a total.

 

Results:

 

Total of 1-3:          You seem to understand the importance of marriage and work together as partners,

While respecting each other’s personalities. Your marriage seems strong, making the probability of infidelity low. Keep working at growing together as a couple though, there is no room for complacency.

 

Total of 4-6:          You seem to have an average grasp of what it takes to make a marriage work,

however there is room for improvement. You should sit down together as a couple and try and identify the key areas you need to work on if you want to save your marriage and reduce the risk of infidelity.

 

Total of 7-10:        Statistically, your marriage is a disaster waiting to happen.

You need to work on communication together, and work as a couple. Once you are married, you need to live as a couple and not as individuals. It is important that you maintain your separate hobbies and interests so that you both have an outlet away from each other. However, when you are together, you need to include your partner in your life and decision making. Its easy to lose track of what is important when you have busy lives. Take the time to sit down together and reassess your priorities and strengthen your weak marriage. You can either do this as a couple, or with a counselor. Many counselors now offer help to couples  before there are significant marital troubles. Try counseling before you start to have major problems.

 

Explanation of Answers:

 

Long courtships and engagements usually make for stronger marriages. You need to allow yourself plenty of time to get to know each other before getting married. This will increase your chances of marital bliss.

Studies show that age plays a part in the success of marriages. This is correlated with maturity and the ability to appreciate the gravity of long- term decisions. Divorce rates are statistically higher amongst couples under the age of 25.

Unexplained mood swings are an indication of an inability to deal with stress. An unhealthy attitude to stress can increase or exaggerate otherwise trivial problems. Mood swings can also be an indication of deeper problems. Your partner may be under a lot of stress if they are hiding something from you, like an affair.

Communication is the key to a strong and healthy marriage. If you don’t feel you can use your partner as an emotional outlet for each other and talk about your day, your experiences, and your feelings, you will begin to grow apart. If you aren’t able to share these feelings with your partner, there is a good chance either you or your partner will seek someone who can fulfill that emotional need. This is where infidelity begins.

While it is important that you share your time and life as a couple, it is important for the health of your relationship that you have separate time apart as well. This time will enable you to develop your own interests and hobbies, such as golf, tennis, night classes, or coffee groups. There may have been things you love doing that your partner doesn’t. There is no reason for you to give up your hobbies, as this will build resentment. Continue to maintain some of your old interests when you marry, and this will enable you to value the time you spend together as a couple.

The early years of marriage are often the hardest, and the ones in which your statistical likelihood of infidelity and divorce are the greatest. At 4 years, and again at 7, some couples undergo crisis, wondering how their  lives may have been different if they had made different choices. It is at this time that many go and have affairs and try and relive their lost youth.

Having children can have a dramatic effect on married life, both physically and financially. Sleepless nights, change in lifestyle, and responsibility can make some people crave for the spontaneity and freedom of their old life, free from the responsibility of parenthood. Affairs can appeal to people, because of the excitement and passion that contrasts so much with married life and parenthood.

Sharing the responsibility of your finances and obligations is important as a couple. If you don’t take the opportunity to sit down and both take responsibility as a couple, you have some issues you need to work through. A marriage is a partnership, therefore you should both have access to bills and statements. If you don’t, you may have some trust issues that could develop into divisions in your marriage.

It is important that amidst the bustle of everyday life, you both make the time to spend quality time together. This means just the two of you. You may be able to get away for the night, or the weekend. It is important that you do this as a couple to reconnect and strengthen your love. If you holiday away from each other, you dramatically increase the risk of infidelity. No matter how strong you feel your marriage is, don’t allow opportunities for this to happen.

It is important that you get along with your respective in-laws. Disharmony and fighting detract from the bond that the two of you share. If you don’t get along with your in-laws, you make it very difficult for your partner who is then forced to choose between you and their parents. This can lead to stress and a lack of fulfillment. Statistically, this can lead to marital breakdowns, most often sparked by infidelity.

Share your thoughts and results in the comments section below.