Why Taking Time To Heal After Your Divorce Is Important

Like most divorcee, your first night without your spouse after a separation or divorce may seem odd. You’ll use every means necessary to distract yourself and you’ll probably feel an uneasy silence lingering in every room of your house. There will be some lonely nights in the beginning and it may feel foreign and strange, but there’s nothing to worry about as these feelings are completely normal.

One of the most important things you have to remember is that, the only way to the other side is to walk directly through the fire on your own.

There are quite a lot of divorced men and women who immediately grabs the chance to hitch themselves to the first possible date to cross their paths, but usually, those cases inevitably lead to failure and heartbreak down the road. Meanwhile, some divorced parents also firmly believe that spending some time alone is the primary reason why they emerged better and stronger after their divorce.

Here are some reasons why you should take the time to heal and to be alone after your marriage has ended:

It can increase your confidence

Spending some time alone will show you that you can endure the storm on your own without having to cling or depend to another person. Your confidence will increase exponentially as a result of your alone time. You will feel like you can face through any challenge up front without needing somebody else to save you. It’s like gaining back the sense of independence and empowerment that you may have lost during your previous relationship.

Before you can move forward

Divorce is a loss, and some people may need more time than others to completely heal. This timeline may vary from person to person, and more often than not— one spouse might move on rather quickly than the other because he/she was never emotionally invested in the marriage to begin with.

You have to realize that taking time is okay. Working through the process at your own pace is important, it is a journey after all, not a race. You need to feel emotionally and spiritually whole before moving forward to another relationship, else it will be ill-fated before it even begins.

Determine which traits are important

After your separation or divorce, you’ll probably have a clearer idea of the traits and characteristics that are very important for your future partner to have— as well as the red flags that you will want to avoid. However, casual dating and observing other people can also enable you to discover and gain experience on what is most important to you before committing to another relationship.

You will have to do the work yourself

No other person can heal you besides yourself; only you can complete that task alone. Nobody will protect you from your suffering so you will have to endure it, live through it, learn from it, and eventually, move on and become the better and happier version of yourself.

Having support from people you trust

Separation and divorce is a stressful time for you and your kids, that’s why having people whom you can talk to is very crucial. While this journey is something you have to tackle on yourself, having some family members and close friends can also be helpful. After all, no man is an island.

Likewise, having good divorce solicitors can also be an advantage. They can help you through a lot of legalities that you may not be familiar with, and give you advice on how you can protect your family (both emotionally and financially). A lot of people can offer you advise based on their personal experiences, but a divorce solicitor knows the legal matters and sees any potential problems that may occur along the way.

Ultimately, take time to heal and re-build yourself. Spend some time with your children (if ever you have any) and reassure them that things will get better in time. Adjusting to a new living situation can be really challenging for them too, so be there for your kids. Allow some time to be free of any expectations or distractions of another person.

Lloyd Platt & Co is UK’s leading firm of family, divorce and criminal solicitors in London. We acknowledge the difficult process of going through a divorce which is why we identify the most efficient strategy to make the process much easier. Our team is here to give you expert advice and support.