Marriage
Ten Tips and Pointer on How To Improve Your Marriage
Apr
By Dave Willis
Being married is not always easy, those who have made it through ten, fifteen even thirty years of marriage have had to really fight for, have had to make compromises and remain committed to each other through thick and thin. These couples have a lot they can teach us on this subject.
For the most part it is not the big problems that cause a marriage to end but rather very small things, this is very true when these small things begin to accumulate. This is what propelled me to ask around looking for various tips and pointers which could be used to improve the love in today’s marriages.
In this article we are not discussing therapy options or any activity which requires any large amount of effort from either party. These are just basic tips and pointer which can make all the difference is honestly and properly implemented.
Here is a list of ten simple ways in which you can improve your marriage immediately:
- If You Are Wrong, Apologize
Pride should have no place in a marriage, if you are have a discussion and realize you may be wrong then stop, admit it and say you’re sorry. This makes all the difference in the world if you want to have a close relationship.
- In the Middle of a Fight, Picture Your Spouse No Longer Being Around
Nothing works better at putting an end to a fight then imagining the loss of your spouse and the feelings that would accompany said loss. Do you feel that sensation in the pit of your stomach? Do you feel your chest tightening and the feeling of sadness enveloping you? This is how much you love them, doesn’t that mean more than winning a stupid fight?
- Find Reasons to Laugh More Often
This has been my biggest secret to a successful ten year marriage, laughter. My husband and I make each other laugh, we burst into laughter at any and all times and we find each other company quite enjoyable. Laughter is a bonding experience.
- Get Together on a Weekly Basis
Touching base is always important but if you both have jobs and maybe even young children it can be difficult to get quality time. Make it a point to meet up once a week and touch base, it doesn’t have to be romantic but it is a form of communicating and avoiding the horrid experience of nagging. A friend of ours who recently implemented this stated: “This has been a very practical activity, it is a great way for us to face our day to day life as a team”. I agree!
- Pencil in Sex
This may not sound like it came off the pages of a passionate romance novel but then again real life is not a novel. Our lives can be quite hectic and busy and it is important to make time for this even if it means making an appointment even if we do not think it is romantic. A marriage without sex is even less romantic.
- The Little Things Matter
It is important to discuss important matters but it is equally important to discuss the little things. Talk, listen, keep talking and listening. The more you talk and listen to each other the more you will learn about each other.
- Have Your Own Life
Not having your own hobbies, activities, and friends can be quite a turn off. Get a life of your own and don’t depend on your spouse to fulfill all your life needs. This is something he or she will appreciate it greatly.
- Be Grateful
It may seem as if it does not matter but it really does. No matter how small or insignificant an action may see it is important to be sincerely grateful and express your gratitude. “Thank you for making dinner”. “Thank you for picking up the dry cleaning”, etc. It is important to feel appreciated and expressing gratitude shows appreciation.
- No More Yelling
There will always be disagreements and even fights, fighting is sometimes important and even healthy but it is not necessary to yell. There should be absolutely yelling, name calling or demeaning, at all!
- Hold Hands
Touching is very important, even if you are upset, just touch each other. Whether in or out of bed a simple touch or caress can minimize feelings of anger or resentment, and improve your marriage.
