1. All Articles, Cheating, Communication
How to Identify an Emotionally Distant Spouse
Aug
There are people who act like they don’t have emotions. Being in a relationship with such individuals can be so frustrating because you won’t be able to identify when they are happy, sad, afraid, in love, etc. No matter the situation, these individuals are always neutral and speak less.
Everyone was born with emotions but the emotionally distant individuals have to some extent tamed their emotions. This distant attitude could be due to disappointments, failures, heartbreaks, or a bad childhood experience.
In a family, an emotionally distant individual often acts reserved and it is difficult to talk to him. Although, being emotionally distant does not imply hating humanity, or being unable, in any situation and context, to enjoy company or even intimacy with someone. They are also social beings but you can only see that aspect of them when you draw closer to them. In this article, we shall look at some common characteristics of an emotionally distant partner.
Mistrust issues:
An emotionally distant individual finds it difficult to trust anyone. Instead of having faith in anyone he depends on himself to make things work. He believes that he is self-sufficient.
Self-denial:
If you are in a relationship with an emotionally distant man, do not bother asking him how he’s doing because his response would always be;” I’m fine”. Even when he is in pains, he wouldn’t share it with you because he believes sharing one’s pains is a sign of weakness.
He avoids physical contact
Unlike other people, the emotionally distant man avoids random physical contact with others. He isn’t that type that stops by to greet everyone with kisses and hugs. He prefers a distant wave. He doesn’t keep intimate friends because he is afraid of being vulnerable to them.
He is vague and inconsistent:
In a relationship, an emotionally distant man is always inconsistent in expressing his feelings. Initially, he might speak of great love and show interest in his partner then after a while he would withdraw from any kind of emotional involvement. He is not ideal for a long-term commitment.
He avoids taking responsibility:
He ignores his role in the relationship and constantly reminds you of how you have failed him on several occasions. He can never accept to take the blames when things go wrong. He loves to be at the receiving end and when you complain, he seems to not understand your point of view.
He is a compulsive liar:
He prefers to lie to save his relationship or to avoid confrontation. He isn’t always faithful because while he is pretending to be in love with one person, he might still be seeking adventure with someone else. He can have sex with anyone but with no emotional strings attached.
Non-expressive of his emotions:
While in a relationship, he hides his deeper thoughts and feelings instead of sharing them with his partner. Even when he is showered with love and affection, he finds it difficult to reciprocate thus creating an imbalance in the relationship.
Everyone needs love and affection so having a distant, cold and withdrawn partner can be very boring. People become emotionally distant because of the fear of being ridiculed or due to stress and depression. Do you have an emotionally distant partner? Whether such an attitude is a recent development or that’s the way your partner has been, you can still guide the individual on how to be more expressive.
The first thing to do is to build healthy communication with the individual. You should make him understand that he can always talk to you. Also, in order to succeed, you need to be patient with him and avoid being judgmental. The moment he feels secured in you he would become more expressive. Meanwhile, if there are no changes after a long period, then you can advise him to see a therapist.
RECOMMENDED SELF HELP BOOKS
https://infidelityrecoveryinstitute.com/shop/how-to-survive-an-affair-ebook/
References
- http://www.beliefnet.com/love-family/relationships/7-solutions-for-an-emotionally-unavailable-partner
- https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201105/cold-people-what-makes-them-way-part-1
- https://www.momjunction.com/articles/signs-of-an-emotionally-unavailable-husband_00411147/#gref
