How to stop the chaos and dysfunction in your relationships

Many people, including myself earlier in life, view friendship and even love as something requiring chaos and dysfunction. It’s what many people saw growing up, and so it is how they define a close or intimate relationship. So if the highs and lows are missing in a relationship, many people will create it in order to feel closeness… they’ll create an argument or some other form of chaos and disorder to be reminded that you care.

There is a way to escape this form of co-dependency… and the need for the up and down emotionally-charged moments that define most relations. There is a way to love and be open with one another, while still respecting boundaries.

In order to be effective in this world, people must learn to wean themselves from the addiction of the roller coaster ride we often call relationships… and seek to establish another form of relationship—based on respect and the freedom to love for where the other person is at and what is important to them. If you’re still trying to change people you care about, you’re missing the point of love and friendship.

The source for healthy relationships is in being comfortable with yourself, in stillness and quiet. You don’t need chaos to prove you’re OK. You are loved. You are more than OK!

[author] [author_image timthumb=’on’]https://infidelityrecoveryinstitute.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/Joe-Whitcomb-Headshot.jpg[/author_image] [author_info]

Joe Whitcomb, PsyDc, LMFT. Author, Psychotherapy and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Find Joe on Facebook. [/author_info] [/author]

 

 

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